Monday, September 29, 2008

How did I get here?

First I apologize for not having a second of time to post much of anything since the bugs came home. Having twins is more challenging than I ever imagined.
I can't believe that today they are already five weeks old! FIVE WEEKS! I now am on the downslope of my maternity leave (which is freaking me out - but that's another post entirely) and the bugs have changed enormously since their birthday. Both boys are now over 8 1/2 pounds (which seems huge to me but I have to stop to remember that those weights are average for singletons) and Alex, who was my smaller bug at birth, has now surpassed his "bigger" brother in weight.
Life in our house is definitely stressful - to say the least. We are severely sleep deprived, dealing with one baby who has a terrible bout of acid reflux and maybe colic, and trying to acclimate ourselves to having two infants, who always seem to want to have bad days/nights at the same time. I have to say I can completely understand how the divorce rate among families with multiples approaches 80%. J and I have to work hard at not snapping at one another when the stress gets out of control. I know we'll be OK in the long run - but I can see how it is going to take a lot of work for us and the importance of making your marriage a priority as well as your children.

I've thought a lot the past few weeks and months about my journey to get where I am today. It has been a long road to travel - sometimes nearly breaking me. The early morning doctor appointments, the humiliation at having numerous doctors and nurses seeing my nether regions, the tests, needle jabs, bruises from injections, disappointment at failed cycles, excitement with positive pee sticks, heartache over lost pregnancies, stress on my marriage, and complete and utter amazement at the birth of the bugs.
J and I walked the long and winding road for over six years. There were times one or both of us wanted to stop, to turn off the road, and walk a different path. Somehow we kept going - and now I can't imagine what life would be like if we had stopped walking. Don't get me wrong - I am NOT naive at all after this whole experience. I know that there are far too many people who don't ever get off the "road". But I am glad that J and I made the decisions together to continue with treatment, even when they seemed futile. I hope for all IF couples that they are also able to find some way off of their own "road" - whatever way that is - and find peace with whatever decisions they make for their own situations.

I'm pretty confident that J and I will not be walking down the IF long and winding road anymore. Given our ages, and what it took to get the bugs, I can't see that we will pursue any additional fertility treatment in the future. And, I'm also pretty confident that there won't be any magical surprise pregnancies in our future either.
Since we've taken a turn and are walking down a different road now, I've decided to close this chapter of my journey and open the next one. I also don't want to write a lot about parenting after infertility on what started out as an infertility/pregnancy loss blog. I know how much it can hurt to read pregnancy and child related posts when you are in the throes of treatments, decision making, or when you've received news about negative cycles.

So, I've decided to write about our new "road" - parenting multiples after infertility - over here. I'll still be following your posts - sharing information about parenting with those of you who have gotten to that point, and cheering those of you on who are still walking the road. I hope that this blog will provide people facing infertility and pregnancy loss with help if they need it. That was one of my goals when I started it. There were certainly a huge number of you who gave me support when I needed it. I thank you for that. And I hope that maybe you'll stop by our new digs and see how J, the bugs, and I are all doing once in a while.

21 comments:

RBandRC said...

So glad to hear you, the bugs and J are hanging in there. The first 6 weeks with one baby was so hard, I can't even imagine what its like with two.

I highly recommend gripe water to help with the colic. Lemy is really collicky and its the only thing that has made a noticeable difference.

Looking forward to following you at your new digs. ((HUGS))

Unknown said...

How are things dear? updates please! And pics too! Weeee!

Unknown said...

Ha ha sorry, I just noticed the link to your new blog. WEEEEE!

Anonymous said...

Good day


Free advance eBay Service to Seller your used and new products at http://www.BuySellDirect.net


http://www.BuySellDirect.net free service is a radical improvement on my present selling on the
Internet

Anonymous said...

The top blog I read this week??

Yours Truly
Frankie

Anonymous said...

Helpful info. Lucky me I found your website unintentionally,
and I'm surprised why this accident didn't came about in advance!
I bookmarked it.
Feel free to surf my webpage :: free porn

Anonymous said...

I enjoy looking through an article that will make people think.
Also, thank you for permitting me to comment!
My webpage Nude Teens

Anonymous said...

Remarkable! Its really remarkable post, I have got much clear idea concerning from this paragraph.
Also visit my homepage - bootszubehor

Anonymous said...

[url=http://sustiva-efavirenz.webs.com/]order Efavirenz 200 mg online
[/url] Generic Sustiva 600 mg online
order Sustiva 200 mg
Generic Sustiva

Anonymous said...

When I initially commented I clicked the "Notify me when new comments are added" checkbox
and now each time a comment is added I get four emails
with the same comment. Is there any way you can remove people from that
service? Bless you!

My site; residential property management real estate

Anonymous said...

Doh! I was domain name searching at namecheap.

com and went to type in the domain name: http://www.
blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=6594993206408063138&postID=5130250147122380243 and
guess who already had it? You did! lol j/k. I was about to
shop for this domain name but noticed it had been taken so I decided I'd come check it out. Good blog!

my web-site; extended stay Tucson AZ

Anonymous said...

Write more, thats all I have to say. Literally, it seems as though
you relied on the video to make your point. You definitely know what youre talking about, why throw away your intelligence on just posting videos to your weblog when you could be
giving us something enlightening to read?

Check out my webpage; oil furnace repair troubleshooting

Anonymous said...

Doh! I was domain name shopping at namecheap.com and went to type in the domain
name: http://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=6594993206408063138&postID=5130250147122380243 and guess who already acquired it?
You did! lol j/k. I was about to purchase this domain name but noticed it had been taken
so I thought I'd come check it out. Nice blog!

Look at my homepage; repair furnace maintenance

Anonymous said...

I've loaded your site in 3 completely different internet browsers and I must say your blog loads a lot quicker then most. Would you mind emailing me the name of your web hosting company? My personal e-mail is: rodericksadler@freenet.de. I will even sign up through your own affiliate link if you would like. Thank you

Feel free to visit my site; www.youtube.com

Anonymous said...

Hi! It seems as though we both have a passion for the same thing.
Your blog, "Blogger: The Infertile Long and Winding Road" and
mine are very similar. Have you ever thought about
authoring a guest post for a related blog? It will unquestionably help
gain publicity to your website (my site recieves a lot of targeted traffic).
If you are interested, contact me at: kattietravis@bigstring.
com. Thanks for your time

Look into my homepage - mosfet switch airsoft

Anonymous said...

Write more, thats all I have to say. Literally, it seems as though you relied on the video to make your
point. You definitely know what youre talking about, why waste
your intelligence on just posting videos to
your weblog when you could be giving us something enlightening to read?


My page - refrigerator light bulb whirlpool

Anonymous said...

Good post but I was wondering if you could write a
litte more on this subject? I'd be very grateful if you could elaborate a little bit further. Cheers!

Feel free to visit my homepage ... wireless charger for nexus 4

Anonymous said...

Hi there! This is my first comment here so I just wanted to give a quick shout out and say I really enjoy reading your blog posts.
Can you recommend any other blogs/websites/forums that deal with the same subjects?
Thank you!

Also visit my website - high tech startup valuation estimator

Anonymous said...

I'm not sure exactly why but this web site is loading extremely slow for me. Is anyone else having this issue or is it a problem on my end? I'll check back later on and see if the problem still exists.


Feel free to surf to my webpage 680 home appliances philippines

Anonymous said...

Whats up are using Wordpress for your site platform?
I'm new to the blog world but I'm trying to get started and
set up my own. Do you require any coding knowledge to make your own blog?
Any help would be really appreciated!

Look at my website: cheap dell computer parts

Unknown said...

This is an amaging post. For information go <a href="http://www.signsofpregnancy24.com/>Signs of Pregnancy</a>